Stark Sleepovers
by soccerkeeper6
Summary: Natasha and Pepper have some girl talk before they go to bed at Tony's sleepover. Instead of going to bed, the boys prepare for battle. Tony's sharpie skills come into question, Natasha has a secret, Clint likes to eavesdrop in the vents, Loki gets into mischief and, boy, does Fury have his hands full. Kid!Avengers. Stony sprinkles.
1. Chapter 1

**A.N: I don't own the Avengers, Marvel and Disney do. Obviously. I only own the plot.**

Sleepovers were a common affair at Stark Towers. Tony would invite all his friends and Pepper to come over and spend time with him. (He liked them more than his robots.) But Fury (The nanny/ruler of everything Tony.) had strict hours for bedtime. When the clock struck nine, the girls would go to their bedroom and the boys theirs. Of course none of them _really_ went straight to sleep though. They would whisper until JARVIS would inform them that Fury was doing a walk around and only then would they actually get under the covers and sleep.  
On this particular night, Pepper and Natasha were seated on the floor, talking.

Nat was the youngest of Tony's friends from SHEILD academy. She had skipped second grade and ended up in Clint's class. She was a mystery to the boys and they liked mysteries- plus Pepper was always complaining about not having and other girls in the group- so they let her in.

Pepper was in Tony's class. One day at lunch Tony had pulled a prank on her, which consisted of a pepper in her sandwich. She had screamed and they all laughed and pointed and began calling her 'Pepper' instead of her real name. Tony, though, was the only one who used it as an endearment, not a taunt, so she began to hang out with him and his friends more. They all joked that she was Tony's assistant, not friend, because she would always fix his class projects when he procrastinated too long and let him copy her homework when he was lazy.

The girls had bonded over their common skill and joy in intimidating the boys and their ambition in their respective fields.

They took the time away from the boys at the sleepover to have girl talk.

"You know how every morning after a sleepover Tony wakes up with the same Sharpie beard drawn on him?"

"Yeah."

Pepper giggled in anticipation of what she was about to say. "And you know how everyone says they didn't do it?"

"Mhm." Natasha nodded.

"I think he draws it on himself when everyone else is asleep." She said in between her giggles.

Now Natasha was giggling also. "Oh my god I bet he does. I bet he thinks it makes him _handsome_."

"Pff. He's already got most of the school crushing on him." Peppers eyes cast towards the floor slightly." As if he needs a beard to look good."

"I think he looks stupid. He's always spaced out and scribbling numbers and drawing cars." Natasha grabbed a pencil and notepad and began to scribble with her eyes far off into the distance- much like a deer in the headlights. "I'm Tony Stark. I got into SHEILD Academy because my Chest glows and I can do long division." She mocked in a deeper voice.

Pepper noticed that, unlike everyone else who was just jealous of Tony, Nat didn't bring his father into this. "What about his robot armor? That's probably why he's in the program. So they can help him learn how to use it."

The red head rolled her eyes. "I've never seen it. I think he's lying."

"Well, I've never seen _you _do anything amazing or different. Maybe you're lying too."

Nat bit her lip gently and she glanced at the ceiling. "I have a… special skill set."

"Prove it."

Natasha grinned and with one fluid motion rolled a backwards summersault, sprang up, landed on her bed in a three point stance and somewhere along the way there had managed to produce her Nerf gun out from under her pillow. With the hand not holding the weapon, she hoisted herself up onto the headboard. Balancing on the edge, she cocked and aimed the gun towards the vent on the ceiling, her index finger ready on the trigger. She first addressed Pepper, "There. My… skill." then focused back on the vent.

"If you don't get out of the vent right now, I will shoot to kill, Clint!"

"Oh my god." His voice had a slight echo, "You're a ninja! How can you be a ninja? I thought ninjas we're supposed to be bald!"

"That's monks you idiot."

Clint looked confused momentarily. "Really?"

"Yes. Now get out."

"So you're not going to deny your ninja identity then?"

"I'm pulling the trigger."

"Am I sworn to secrecy no- OW!" Clint cried as a Nerf bullet made contact with his cheek.

Natasha was unfazed by his outcry. "Why are you spying on us, Clint?"

Still rubbing his cheek he answered proudly, "Because you're pretty," Nat shot him again to distract the boy from her blush. "And Pepper can't hurt me up here. You on the other hand are a monster! That was my eye!"

"I know. Now get out. Or I will tell on you."

Clint followed up on what seemed a bluff. "You wouldn't."

Natasha gave him a broad smile. "JARVIS? Please tell F-"

Clint had heard enough. He opened the vent and hopped down onto Natasha's bed. The shaking made her lose her balance and she fell on Clint but quickly sprang up and rolled her friend off the bed and onto the floor with a thud before he could even register what had happened. "'l'll leave! Don't hurt me! Wait, Pepper-" He glanced her way and saw a wide eyed third grader in her own world. He turned back to Nat, who had the gun trained on him once more. "What happened to Pepper?"

Natasha glanced at the other girl in the room. "Your face must've traumatized her."

Clint crab walked to the door, "Whatever, Tash." He stood and gave her a clicking wink ("I'm going to kill Tony for teaching him that.") "Stay beautiful." And with that, he left.

Her blush was far from cleared even as Clint was far enough away that his footsteps had silenced. Eventually she snapped out of her trance. Pepper wasn't as lucky. Nat went to her.

"Are you alright?" Pepper didn't respond. The spy in training took a stab at what may have triggered the trance like behavior. "Was my… skill set too much for you?" Since people were always shocked to see such a gifted seven year old she figured that must've been it.  
Pepper finally stirred. In on long breath, she breathed out, " YouhaveacrushonClint."

Natasha blushed again, and set her gun down. So that's what phased the iron Pepper. She decided to go with it. "Maaayyybbeeee."

They giggled some more.


	2. Chapter 2

**A.N: I don't own the Avengers, Marvel and Disney do. Obviously. I only own the plot.**

Clint walked down the hallway rubbing his eye that Natasha shot. Besides his one injury he felt good. Who would have thought spying was more fun when you got caught? Definitely worth a sore eye and red cheek.

"Why are you wandering the halls, Barton?"

Careful not to make any sudden movements, the third grader removed his hand from his face and looked up at Fury.

Clint was generally a good liar, "Uh, I was thirsty?" but he was still in Natashaland and Fury scared him.

Fury didn't bite, much to Clint's dismay. "Were you in the vents again?"

The kid puffed out his chest. "No! JARVIS, tell him I wasn't-"

"Just go to sleep, Barton. I'm not in the mood for kiddie CSI." Fury interrupted, agitated.

"Yes, Sir." Clint gave him a salute and then sprinted the rest of the way to Tony's room.  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Everyone turned to look when the door slammed.

"Welcome back, Robin Hood!" Tony shouted. It took him a good three minutes to think of that line and he wasn't about to let it go to waste.

Still winded from his run, Clint held up a finger, silently asking for a minute to catch his breath. Thor turned to Steve confused. Steve just shrugged.

"Guys." He walked over to where the rest of the boys were gathered around Legos. "I got caught."

Steve's eyes grew to the size of moons. "Fury found you in the vents!"

"Did he take off the patch and shoot you with his laser eye?" Loki exclaimed with wonder and a sparkle in his eye. Nobody answered. _Stupid Thor. I didn't want to come to his friend's stupid sleepover anyway. _The first grader went back to building a throne with the Legos he was rationed.

"No. Even worse. Natasha found me."

Tony gasped dramatically and pretended to faint.

"Were you spying on them again, Clint." Said Steve.

Bruce mumbled so quietly no one really heard, "You shouldn't do that. It's like poking a sleeping dragon."

"Of course I was spying on them again. But guys, Natasha?" He lowered his voice to a whisper. "She's a ninja."

Bruce sighed. "Clint, you're not making any sense. Just because she can jump farther off the swings than you doesn't make her a ninja."

"No, she is. She, like, did this thing then shot me in the face with a Nerf gun."

"A thing?"

"A _ninja_ thing."

Silence followed. Tony finally piped up, unable to deal with the lack of noise. "Did you see Pepper?"

"Yeah!"

"Did she look like a green monster with cucumber eyes?"

"No."

"Oh. She did last time."

Steve awkwardly fiddled with his Lego figure. "Did you spy on Pepper at a sleepover?"

Tony tilted his whole body sideways to the point where his head was on Steve's shoulder. "Why? Would you be jealous?"

Bruce looked away, finding that the floor was suddenly fascinating. Loki smirked at the scene unfolding but was interrupted when the hammer Thor made with Mega Blocks connected with his shoulder. Loki dismantled it and began making some sort of staff with the remains.

Steve turned his head to his friend, not realizing how close he was, and got a mouthful of Tony hair. ('He even tastes like strawberries!' was a passing thought.) He turned away enough to where he could speak but still have the softness against his cheek. "I wouldn't be jealous. I'm just concerned…"

Tony patted Steve cheek twice. Everything was going to plan, down to Steve blushing. "Course you're just concerned, Stevie." He then lifted his head off his friend.

"If you guys are done playing house, we have serious stuff to pay attention to." Clint said as he began making something with the Legos.

"What is your plan this time, Clint?" Thor's voice was deep for an eight year old. "Promise me you will not get us into trouble again."

Tony was annoyed. He liked trouble. "Why do you sound so regal all the time, Thor? If anyone is royalty here, it's me. And besides, it's my house. What's the plan, Clint?"

* * *

"When did you start liking him!" Pepper squeed.

"I don't know. A while ago?" Nat lied. Of course she knew when she starting liking the kid in her class who snuck his SHIELD issued bow and arrows out of the training course and started shooting the teacher's bulletin board. It was when she started accepting it that she wasn't sure of.

"Does anyone else know? Am I the only one? Did you tell me first?" She pressed.

"Shhh. No one else knows."

Pepper scooted closer to the Natasha and spoke softly. "I won't tell anyone." She mimed locking her mouth.

"Thanks, Peps. So," She nudged her friend with her shoulder. "Do you like anyone?"

"Yeah, but I think he likes someone else." Her words were laced with disappointment.

Natasha wasn't sure if she should drop the topic or push on. She liked boy talk- she rarely got to indulge in it- but did Pepper like it? Probably. "Is she cute?"

"Yeah, he is."

"No, not the person you like. The person they like."

The strawberry-blond looked straight into Nat's eyes and iterated slowly. "Yeah. _He _is."

"Oh." She picked up the hint this time. "Steve or Tony?"

"Tony. I saw him kiss Steve on the cheek last month."

"Wasn't it Steve's birthday last month?"

"A very happy one. Wait. How did you know Tony and Steve like each other?" Pepper thought she was the only one. Did everyone know except her? This was even worse than she thought.

"I'm a ninja. Like Clint said." She lied again. What else was she supposed to do? She promised Steve she wouldn't tell anyone. He was so embarrassed and confused. She couldn't break the promise that cemented their friendship and trust.

"Whatever." Pepper chose to change the topic. If Natasha wanted to lie about everyone knowing except her, fine. She wasn't sure if she wanted the truth anyway. The truth can hurt. "None of it matters anyway. So how are we going to get back at Clint for spying on us?"

"I think I have the perfect idea, Peps."

**A.N: Thank you to everyone who favorited, reviewed and story alerted this! This is my first story posted here, so I had no idea what to expect. I definitely did not expect such a positive reaction. I'll try to write the next chapter tomorrow. If you'd like to suggest what you think Pepper and Natasha's revenge should be, or the boys' plan to spy on the girls again, message me. **

**I hope chapter 2 lived up to your expectation. :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**A.N: I don't own the Avengers, Marvel and Disney do. Obviously. I only own the plot.**

Natasha crept down the hallways, quite as ever. Usually Fury was asleep by now but you could never be too careful. Rumor was that a whole AI was programmed into his eye patch just to tell him when things were happening behind his back. It seemed silly, but she wasn't going to take any chances. From where Pepper and she slept to where the boys were, was two lefts, down the staircase and once to the right. It wasn't far for her to make at all. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

Worried the stairs might squeak, Nat climbed onto the railing and slid down. Sliding on railings was a bit scary, (And even scarier in the darkness of the night.) because there's nothing to catch you if you fall, but that made it all the more thrilling to the third grader. When she reached the bottom, she softly jumped down, landing on the balls of her feet and made almost no noise at all. She quickly made way to Tony's room.

The door was already cracked open slightly. She slipped into the room with ease. Tony was sprawled out on his bed. Clint was in Tony's favourite hammock with one arm and leg hanging off the edge. He was snoring slightly. _Always up high, Clint. It's not enough that your head's in the clouds, your body needs to be, too. _Nat thought.

Bruce and Thor were in their sleeping bags on the floor at the foot of Tony's bed, and Steve was just to the side of them tangled in blankets. Loki was far off in the corner, propped up against the wall sleeping. He had a vice like grip on his Lego scepter and was muttering something. Most people looked peaceful when they slept; Loki looked like his cat just turned angry on him in the middle of a cuddle session. Natasha started walking towards him.

'gaAH' was something along the lines of what came out of her mouth a couple steps into the room. She looked around. No one seemed to have woken up. Good. Nat picked up whatever she had stepped on that had caused her so much pain. A Lego brick. _These should be some sort of burglar security thingie. I wouldn't break into a house with these things everywhere. S_he then ignored her latest statement and continued to 'break in' to Tony's lego protected room. (Though, much more carefully.) She danced around the scattered toys until she reached her target.

"Loki." She gently whispered. Nothing happened. She pushed on his shoulder. "Loki, get up."

His head swayed a bit as he began to stir. "No, Thor. I don't want to get up. I'll get up when I want to." He said groggily.

Nat rolled her eyes. "No, it's me, Natasha. Now get up."

Loki didn't want to open his eyes. This was just a joke, wasn't it? Just another stupid prank his brother and Tony made up. But that did sound a lot like Natasha. He cracked open one eye and let it adjust in the dark. Then he opened the other one in shock that the best thing possible happened. It was truly Natasha! "Nat what are you doing here. You're a girl! This is the boys' room!"

"Shh. You'll wake the others." She whispered.

"Sorry." He whispered back. He looked at everyone else. _Weird. Thor usually drools a bit when he sleeps. _Loki noticed, then turned his attention back to the girl who had snuck into a room _just for him._ This stupid sleepover was turning out to be okay after all.

"Pepper and I need your help."

The first grader nodded enthusiastically.

"Can you help us get back at Clint for spying on us?"

Best. Sleepover. Ever. He had been waiting forever for this. _Act innocent, Odenson, just like we've practiced. _He nodded even more enthusiastically, his chin almost to his chest then tilting all the way back, but he did it more slowly. (That's how you make it look cool, not silly.) He paused after a few nods and thought over what she had said once more. He said the first thought that came to his mind. "Just Clint?"

"And maybe the rest of the boys too. We'll see. So you're in?" Nat held out her pinkie for him to shake. He took it with his and shook.

"I'm in."

They tip toed back to the girl's room. Loki still had his scepter in his hand.

* * *

The boys waited a minute until the 'company' had gone. Tony sat up slowly. Everyone else followed his lead, except Bruce. He got a pillow to the head for it.

"She took my baby brother!" Thor whisper yelled.

Clint whisper yelled back. "She ruined my," Tony glared. "…our plans!"

"Why was I hit with a pillow?" Bruce asked, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

Tony quickly responded, "You fell asleep. You we're supposed to just pretend, Bruce." then turned back to Clint and Thor. "The girls have declared war."

Steve wanted to be a soldier when he grew up, but not now. He didn't like the idea of war with his friends. "Maybe Clint can just say he's sorry?"

Everyone went silent. Steve shrunk under everyone's eyes staring at him. "Or we can go into war?"

Clint hopped down from the hammock. "Tony? Where's the Nerf? I think she needs a taste of her own medicine."

* * *

Pepper heard the secret code being tapped out on the door. She let them in. "So Loki knows what's going on?" She said to the pair.

"We're going to destroy the others." Loki confirmed.

"Err. Sure. 'Destroy'" What did Natasha have to tell the kid to get him to join? "Why do you have a staff?"

Loki looked at his scepter and pouted at her choice of words. "It's not a staff! It is my battle scepter! "

Pepper and Natasha exchanged glances. They knew Loki wasn't a normal first grader. He was quiet and a lot of people made fun of him. But when your back was turned, he would pull the grandest of pranks. All the teachers called him the king of mischief. (A title Loki enjoyed tremendously.)That's why the girls wanted him on their side. He was a valuable ally. But a 'battle scepter'? That was a littler far off, even for the kid from the family that wore capes on occasion.

Loki then proudly added, "I made it myself."

"So anyway," Natasha redirected. "We need you to help us come up with something to do to them. A prank."

"Hmm." He sat down and thought. He had many things planned for Thor and his friends. But he was past whoopee cushions and handshake buzzers. He wanted to pull a prank they would remember. "Do you have any make up?"

**A.N. I'm sorry. I feel like this was kind of short. Next chapter will be longer and hopefully up Saturday, but I want to make it really nice, not just throw it out there with a ton of errors, so if it is delayed until Sunday, I give you my word it will be longer and quality.**

**Thank you for taking the time to read this! I literally dance every time someone favorites, comments or subscribes to the story. I just hope my writing continues to be up to your expectation.**

******Also, a special thanks to BeanDipMcGee for the suggestion of make up as part of the girls' (And now Loki's.) prank. I can't wait to write that scene! (Though, I will have to learn the basics of make up now for accuracy. My mother will be so proud.)**

******That is all.**


	4. Chapter 4

**A.N: I don't own the Avengers, Marvel and Disney do. Obviously.**

**Also, the Nerf gear the boys are using can be found by typing the word encased in quotes to Google: '****NERF ACTION BLASTERS BIG BAD BOW' ****for Clint's bow; 'NERF VORTEX VIGILON Blaster' for Steve's disc launcher; 'NERF N-STRIKE BARRICADE RV-10' for Thor's automatic gun thing; 'NERF N-STRIKE MAVERICK REV-6' for Tony's revolver.**

* * *

"You all have your weapons?"

Clint tucked his last arrow in his pajama's waistband then picked up his 'Big Bad Bow' or as he liked to call it, Karen. (His real bow's name was Talon since that's a hawk's greatest weapon, and he admired hawks a lot. The Nerf bow couldn't hurt anything, so he gave it a less threatening name.) "Yup."

"Yes." Thor said, frustrated. Why did he have to get the automatic gun? As if he knew how to work a 'Strike Barricade,' whatever that was. It practically had its own mind. "It will suffice."

Tony shook his head slightly. What nine year old spoke like that? He, himself, was a genius and even he didn't speak that way. _Either Thor was a king in a past life, or he's not from Earth_. Tony decided.

Steve looked at his disc launcher. "Err. I guess." He responded to Tony's question.

Tony cocked his revolver just like he'd seen the cops do in CSI with real guns. "Awesome. Bruce?"

"I don't have anything."

Clint looked displeased. "Well grab something, then."

Bruce shifted uncomfortably. "Can I just… be a look out, or something?"

Clint and Tony looked at each other to silently agree if it was truly alright or not. "If that's what you want, granny." Tony finally said aloud so the others knew what their final decision was.

Thor put his hand on the door knob. "Come, friends. Let's go take back my baby brother. I cannot even imagine what torture he has already suffered through. I fear the worst."

The worry-stricken blonde opened the door, and led the way to the girls' room. Bruce and Steve were smirking the whole way. Leave it to Thor to make something serious sound like a joke. Clint and Tony just gave an eye roll to it. They felt it was a joke getting old.

The rest of the journey was covered in silence.

* * *

"Okay, this is all the makeup, markers, and face paint that I could find." Natasha said, dumping her arm load of various cosmetics onto the floor. None of the makeup had even been used before, even though they had been there since the first sleepover Tony had with girls. Pepper told Nat that it wasn't good for girls their age to wear makeup because once, she was going to borrow her mom's makeup but got caught and into huge trouble. She was told that if you wore makeup too young, you could get addicted, especially if it was someone else's makeup and she passed that information onto Natasha. Obviously the makeup at Tony's house wasn't theirs, even if they were allowed to use it, so the two of them stayed far away from it. She thought it was funny that Tony's mom would give them free access to something that was bad and addictive. Maybe it was a test? But now she was glad it was there. Getting the boys addicted to makeup would be the best prank ever.

"Why did you get colored pencils?" Loki inquired.

"It's eye liner. Or lip liner. I'm not really sure." She (in a way) corrected.

Loki took one and made a line on his hand to test it. Pepper let out a little gasp but said nothing. It was a brownish pink and kind of tickled as he continued the line all the way down the backside of his hand. It was much nicer than any Crayola pencil he'd ever seen. Maybe if he was good, mother would buy him a twenty four pack of them. "Hmm. Well alright then. Pepper, what have you got?"

Pepper didn't really like being bossed around by a _kid_. (Little kid by her standards.) She had hoped that he would tell them something clever to do, then happily take a back seat. Boy, was she mistaken. Loki had flourished in his newly given position and took over the entire operation in no time. He seemed to be so happy about the whole thing. He was almost glowing in ecstasy. But he was good at prank organization, she'd give him that, and so she followed his orders regardless of his age and frighteningly quick adaptive personality. "I found three tiaras, a creepy life size Barbie wig, and a removable tattoo."

"Wonderful. Any nail paint?"

"Polish. And, um, no. I didn't see it anywhere. I know we have some, but we hid it a while back. I can't remember where."

Natasha was also getting tired of Loki running what was supposed to have been her show. He did realize _she _asked _him_ to join, not the other way around, right? "I think were fine without it, Loki. Now you said the boys usually fall asleep around eleven?"

"Yes, but-"

"And it's eleven thirty now. Let's pack all this," She gestured to their pile of gear. "up and sneak to their room at twelve sharp. I'll do Clint and Steve's makeup. Pepper? Who do you want to take?" Loki could pick last to make it fair on account of him getting to decide what they did. Well, fair_er._ There wasn't exactly a number value of the work Pepper and she had done plus the decision in the first place, so there wasn't a way to make it exactly 'fair'.

Pepper looked up from the basket she was already packing. "Tony."

"Just Tony?" Loki asked. _I_ _thought she too wanted revenge on all of them._

The strawberry blond looked at Loki. A fierce flame flickered in her eye. "Just. Tony."

"And I'm to get my brother and the shy one?"

Natasha looked at him like he just asked whether Drain-o was poisonous or not. "Well, duh. They're the only ones left."

"True."

"Okay then." Pepper picked up the now filled basket. It was really heavy and with everything rolling around, not so quiet. Not exactly the best combination for night transport. "It's ready. But do we have to be as quiet as _you_, Nat?"

"If it's possible. You know Fury. He's not a light sleeper, but he's not that deep of a sleeper either."

Pepper looked down at the basket of goods in her hand. "Shoot. I'm going to need more time. "

Loki dramatically sighed. He wanted to go now. Time was being wasted. But he knew he needed to cooperate. 'Battle scepter' in hand, he took a seat and waited for the girls to sort things out. _I guess this isn't so bad. _He decided later on. It was certainly better than being with the boys.

* * *

Tony gave the gang a nod before flinging the door open, gun at the ready. He smiled at the look on all three of their faces. "We're bringing the party to you." He told them, then motioned for the rest of the boys to enter. They appeared from the hallway and made their way in. Loki was too shocked at their appearance to do anything quite yet; Pepper was staying still so she could run all the possible ways to handle this as efficiently as possible, and Natasha was sizing them up.

Tony noticed the basket between Nat and Pep. "Wait, are you guys going to a coloring picnic or something? You know what? Never mind." He heard Bruce close the door. That was his (second) cue. "Open fire, boys!"


	5. Chapter 5

**A.N: And finally it's up! It took me forever to think of what I was going to do. The thing with leaving your characters in situations is that you have to find a way out, and damn was that exit hidden for the longest time**. **Enjoy!**

**Also, I do not own the Avengers, Marvel and Disney do. Obviously. I just own the plot.**

* * *

Pepper wasn't in the same division of SHIELD academy as the rest of her friends. Yes, she was in Tony's class and had lunch, followed by recess with them all, but at SHIELD, there was all that, and then there was the afternoon . The afternoon was the real reason you went to SHIELD. It was very different. The afternoon was fun, for one. It was also when you got split into your division. There were three overall divisions, then the subcategories based on skill, not age. Pepper was the top of her skill set in the Special Agent division. Special Agent Phil Coulson was her mentor.

Being in the top of the skill set had come naturally to her. Organization, people skills and a smile that said more than what you had _actually _said, she had down pat. Everyone told her she would be the next Phil in no time. (Except Phil, of course. He said kindly that she would be his equal in no time.) The one thing Phil had needed to teach her was self defense.

SHIELD, though known for its readiness to use force, didn't believe in teaching their youngest Special Agents offensive tactics. The Special Agents had to learn to ask questions first then strike once they're answered. (Which was not the case for the others.) The entire division had to wait until middle school for offensive tactics.

Pepper patiently waited through elementary school like she was told to up until recently when Phil started testing her on things they both knew she could do in her sleep. That was when she decided she was done with waiting.

"Mr. Coulson, I want to learn some offensive moves."

"Pepper, you know the school policy."

"But you know I'm ready! I can do it!"

"I know you're more than capable, but the Director has strict rules. I don't have the clearance and neither do you."

Pepper knew this was Coulson's way of putting his foot down, and there was no hope of tricking the man into it; he taught her everything she knew. She went through other options. Confusion, word rearrangement, and emotional persuasion were probably out. That left compromise and 'partial truths'.

"In self defense, are there things you can do to… get the upper hand? Kinda, taking back control of the situation?" She asked, hoping it would get the idea across slyly.

"A transition of sorts from defense to offence?"

"Of course not. That would brush the idea of offence- we don't have clearance for that. I'm saying the 'final stage' of defense, you know?"

"Are you saying we brush the transition? You do realize that is a _very_ fine line, Miss. Potts?"

She was so close to getting her way. She needed everything she had. That included the one thing she had learned at home, not at school. Pepper widened her eyes just a little and turned more towards the lamp so that the light reflected off her eyes. (She called it 'The Sadness'.) She then gave a feeble shrug and said slightly mumbled, "It's still a line."

Phil saw right through her act, but only because he had been her trainer ever since her performance the first week that blew everyone away. He was proud of her, and she was ready, and well, _it is still technically a line. _So Coulson gave her that one million word smile, and she knew she had won.

* * *

That took place many, many weeks ago. Since then, Pepper had dug into that thin line as far as she could go without setting off alarms. Tony was going to regret barging in.

She grabbed a tube of lipstick, some eye liner and lunged.

Tony wasn't sure what he was more surprised about: Having his gun swatted out of his hands, or being pinned to the wall and becoming a living painting. For once, he had no witty remark. He barely managed to squeak, "Help."

Pepper continued to draw his signature beard on him in bright pink, ignoring the chaos that broke out around them. "You just don't understand, do you, Tony? I know you're smart. I know you have the brain of a high schooler, but you just don't get it? I'm so nice to you all the time. I thought we were close. And I'm fine. I really am. It's not really my business I guess, but really? You're just so stupid, Tony. And pink isn't your color."

For the first time in a while, Tony was genuinely afraid of Pepper. Maybe even more than that one time before, and that was when he accidentally set her pigtail on fire. She was on fire now too, but Tony didn't need science to figure out that this flame didn't burn off of oxygen. He realized that still not understanding what she was saying wasn't going to help his cause, so he went with the only thing he did understand. "Of course pink is my color. Every color is my color. Ask anyone."

Okay, so that didn't help his cause either. All it did was get him a strong pinch on the upper arm. "Pepper, you know I have a bruise there!" He complained.

"Shut up, Anthony! Just, please shut up, so I can put lipstick on you." Pepper said with less force than her last outburst, but it stung. She had used his full name. This was bad. Tony did as he was told, knowing he was beat, and had Electric Blue applied to him like a good little hostage.

* * *

Nat smiled at her friend. That explains why her crush overshadowed her skill set in Pepper's mind. It made sense. SHIELD didn't just accept anybody. Though she had always thought Pepper was more of a special agent, but they must have classified her as field; Nat knew for a fact special agents didn't know _that._ At least until middle school. She turned away from Pepper and focused back on her task.

Sneaking behind her opponent was easy amidst all the noise. The next part, Nat was going to have to work for. She took a quick breath before throwing all her speed and accuracy into a diving roll. Before curling in for the roll, she snatched all but one of Clint's arrows that were tucked in his waist band. It would have to do. What could Clint possibly do with just one arrow? A foam one at that.

She turned to shove the arrows under the bed, but something made contact with the back of her knee and she fumbled, everything in her arms tumbling out of her grasp. Fortunately, the mattress broke her fall. Unfortunately, there was now a finger on her pressure point.

"You're a quick ninja. I'm quick, too, but not a ninja yet. Miss me, cutie?"

* * *

Loki couldn't help but grin. Yes, this was a fine sleepover indeed. He tucked a few supplies in his pockets then went to the far corner of the room. "Brother! You found me! Come here!" He called once in position.

"BABY LOKI!" Thor dropped the gun (That he never did figure out how to work, by the way.) and went in the direction of his brother's voice until he saw the kid. The first grader's eyes were glistening with tears. Oh, what have the frosts* done to him? Mom was never going to trust him to look after Loki again.

"Brother come here. I must tell you something, but the others can't hear it."

Thor nodded and rushed to his side. Loki cupped his hand around the blonde's ear and leaned in.

"How does it feel to lose?" He whispered, then pushed Thor down, sweeping blue dust all over the shocked boy's face and arms.

* * *

*Sometimes at family dinners, Thor would overhear his dad talking about his giant 'frost conquests' in his youth. Later, after Thor made sure he was hearing right, he asked what a frost was. Father told him that a frost was a girl, because girls were cold, and where exactly did he hear daddy using that word again?

* * *

Steve looked at everyone fighting. This wasn't exactly how his pictured his first war. Pepper was trapping their leader, Clint was about to have his finger broken by Natasha, and Thor was literally blue. (But he was laughing and giving a very angry Loki a noogie all the same. If those two were any example, the place they moved here from must be a _very _weird place.) At least no one was dead, Steve reasoned.

"Hey, Steve. Tony or Pepper?" A voice reached him from the side.

Steve snapped out of his trance. Did Bruce know? He began to panic and blush at the same time. No, this was not how he pictured his first war _at all_. "What?"

"Who do you think is going to win? Pepper or Tony?" Bruce clarified.

"I… um… Pepper. Because Tony would never hurt her on purpose, but I think she's about to hurt him." He concluded. "Maybe I should go and help. Aren't you supposed to be on watch or something?"

The only calm and collected one left, Bruce leaned against the door, achieving the coolness Clint and Tony had been trying to achieve all night in one effortless gesture. "Yeah. I don't do well in chaos."

"Oh." That made sense. "You stay here then. I should go help." Steve ran into the room towards his friends locked in war.

"Bye." Bruce said to no one in particular, as it seemed they were all preoccupied.

* * *

"Thor, you will regret this! I almost had you this time! My next prank won't be so forgiving!" Loki squawked as his brother continued to laugh and treat him like a rag doll.

"Oh little brother, I do love your pranks. And the color blue! It suits me. Like those jeans I wore that Jane enjoys so much. Thank you. What could have been terrible has turned out to be a memorable game of sorts."

Loki jammed the bottom of his battle scepter into Thor's foot as a way of asking to be let down. He was dropped instead of let down, but close enough. "You're mean, Thor. Go away. I'm sure my new friends would agree that you aren't welcome in this room. It is the girls' room after all." He crossed his arms in defiance.

"But Loki, you are not a girl. This means you belong back in the boys room, with me."

"No, Thor. I-" Loki's words were cut off by Thor dragging him back towards the door. He felt like he had been beat by a smurf. Or a blueberry. Either way, it still did not count as being beat by Thor in his books. That just wasn't possible.

* * *

"Clint did you really think it was a good idea to threaten a ninja with your finger?"

"Well I guess I never did listen to my dad when he said not to point."

"You are an idiot."

"I know."

Natasha picked up all the arrows and Karen, then released Clint's finger. Clint gave her puppy eyes and gestured to the goods in her arms.

"Nope. You're not getting these back. Now go help Loki. It looks like he'll need it."

Clint considered it, then sat down. "No, I think I'll stay here."

"Fine." Nat pulled out the removable tattoo. It was a big heart. She pressed it to Clint's forehead wearily. She thought for sure he would have bolted by now. Instead, he looked eager to receive it. She counted out the twenty seconds then removed the plastic film. There, as clear as day, was a ruby red heart in the center of Clint Barton's forehead.

He smiled. "Am I a real ninja now?"

_So that's why he didn't bolt. _She thought. _He's completely mad. _"What?"

"Was that the ritual? Did you put some marking on my head to make it official?"

She sighed. "Just… go look in the mirror."

He walked over to her dresser and screamed. "YOU'RE A LOVE NINJA! THAT'S WHY I HAVE A CRUSH ON YOU! YOU TRICKED ME! I DON'T WANT TO BE A NINJA ANYMORE!"

Natasha sunk down to the floor, blushing. Maybe Pepper was having a better time with the prank than the other two-thirds of their team?

* * *

"Pepper, I think he's had enough. This prank has gone too far. You need to stop." Steve said as calmly as possible. (In truth, he wanted to scream like Clint because an angry Pepper is terrifying.)

Tony, who now had pink eyebrows and sideburns to match his also pink beard and blue lips, mouthed, "Help me." at Steve. He was answered with a stern 'shut up' glare.

"Pepper," Steve tried again. "Clint's down, Thor and Loki are both gone, and Tony's had enough."

Pepper lowered the lipstick. "You're right. I'm sorry." Steve let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding. Pepper continued. "Tony's had enough. It's your turn."

Horrified was an understatement. Steve was petrified in every sense of the word. He couldn't move, he couldn't think, he couldn't speak. Tony's yell of, "Do something!" snapped him out of it. He shot the lipstick with his disc gun. The makeup fell to the floor with a clatter.

"Pink then?" Pepper asked, pulling out the eyeliner without missing a beat.

Steve was starting to be more confident. Shooting it actually worked! Would asking it to work a second time be asking too much? He shot her shoulder, hoping the distraction would loosen her grip, then shot the eye liner. It also fell with a clatter.

Pepper clutched her shoulder and let out a sniffle. A tear escaped her left eye. She turned away from Steve.

_Oh my god I made a girl cry. I made Pepper cry! S_teve was flustered again. He could grab Tony and Clint now to make an escape attempt, but he knew deep down that wasn't the right thing; it was the easy thing. A great soldier never chose easy over right. He set his gun down and approached the crying girl. "Peps I'm so sorry. I'm so super sorry. I panicked. I should have known that even Nerf guns are still a weapon. How badly are you hurt?"

Pepper looked up, her face wasn't red or tear stained as he expected. It was calm. Eerily calm. Steve braced himself for the worst. "You- you shot me!" She sounded cheerful, and began to smile. "Then apologized instead of running? Are you stupid or did you want to have a 'bigger person' moment?"

"Err-" He stammered. "I, um, _is this a trick question?_"

Pepper looked at the scared, confused boy in front of her. He was tall, pretty, smart and heroic. But she was also. Why did Tony like him instead of her? Maybe Tony really did think she was only his 'assistant'. Was that her fault? No, but it wasn't really Tony's either. It was just how things had happened. And as much as she wanted someone to blame, that someone being Steve, this whole ordeal had made her realize that he wasn't out to get her, to steal Tony away- it was the same for him. It was just how things had played out for him.

"Yeah, it's a trick question, Steve." She shoved Tony towards the door with one hand, and clapped Steve on the shoulder with the other. "Have fun taking him to makeup rehab or whatever."

With shared puzzlement on their faces, the two boys took that as their cue to leave and scurried out of the room. Down the hallway, Steve realized they had forgotten Clint.

"Whatever. He's gotten out of there alive before, he might get lucky and be able to do it again." Tony told him. Frankly, Tony couldn't care less about Clint right now. That was his second (No, _third_.) brush with death and he was going to go back to his room, sleep for ten hours, then celebrate with strawberry pancakes. Whether or not Robin Hood joined them just didn't feel very important at the moment.

* * *

Bruce woke up when the floor met his face. _Must've fallen asleep standing again_. He mused. A glance at his watch told him it was twelve thirty five. Was the fighting still going on? Was he still on watch? He reentered the room, only to find an un-amused Natasha, sleepy Pepper, and smug Clint being chewed out by Fury. He tried to retreat but, bless his luck, Clint called him out.

"Morning, Sleeping Beauty! Good job on watch! Fury heard the party."

Bruce rubbed his eyes. He never seemed to get into these sort of messes while quietly reading. Maybe it was a sign? "Am I in trouble?"

Fury made a noise that almost sounded like a laugh.

* * *

**A.N: Again, thank you for all the lovely reviews, for favoriting and for setting up story alerts. I really appreciate it.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A.N: I apologize for the extremely late update. Between soccer starting and fighting for an 'A' in math I haven't had much time to write and I didn't see a good break for this chapter so I couldn't make it two parts. But at least it's up.**

**Also, I don't own the Avengers. Marvel and Disney do. Obviously. **

* * *

"I'll deal with you later, Banner. Go back to your room." Fury sternly ordered.

Bruce nodded and slowly moved. "Do you want me to close the door?"

"Yes."

He did so, then headed back to Tony's.

O0O0O0

Steve felt a hand pat his back. "Go back to the room, Mr. Rightious." Tony said."I'm gonna go wash this stuff off. Less is more with makeup, right?"

"Err. Sure." Steve responded. "See you in the morning, Tony." He watched Tony close the bathroom door halfway and finished the distance to the boys' room. Even outside the door, Steve could hear Thor lecturing Loki. He went in anyway.

O0O0O0

"You should have awoken me!" Thor bellowed.

Loki rolled his eyes. "You were already awake, idiot. Don't you understand; I wanted to go!" He turned to Steve, who had just entered, and make it clear he was now addressing them both the older boys. "You lot are no fun at all."

Steve put up his hands defensively. He didn't want any part in the brothers' endless squabbles. _That_ was a war not worth fighting in. Luckily his Legos were still out. He continued building a red, white, and blue disk like thing. _Why did Thor bring Loki again? _He wondered, as the brothers continued to bicker.

O0O0O0

Bruce scratched his head, thinking about recent events. Things had gotten really bad, fast. _Typical Stark sleepover. _He chuckled. Tony did like to do things differently, that's for sure. He turned the corner and saw a light on. The closer he got, the louder the splashing sound got. Was someone running a bath?

"Help me, Bruce. Help me, I've tried everything. I don't want to be like this forever."

Bruce couldn't help but smile as he saw Tony, face pink, blue, and purple where the colors met, begging for help from the bathroom. The sink was on full blast, and very soapy, but not even a tint of color from Tony's face was in the suds.

"Exactly what do you need help with?" He stalled. Where was a camera when you needed one?

"The makeup. I've used liquid soap, bar soap, hot water, cold water, wash cloths, tissues, sponges – I've even tried to scratch it off with my fingernails. _Nothing works._"

Bruce sighed. Pepper was right. For a genius, Tony was an idiot. "The girls probably have makeup remover in their makeup picnic thing. Maybe if you're sweeter than a simple sugar solution they'll give you it."

"Or they'll beat me up."

"At least we're 100 percent sure that bruises can heal and disappear, unlike the makeup." He reasoned.

Tony contemplated this. If he went to school like this, all _pink_, he would be teased forever. Maybe he could get remover elsewhere though?

"JARVIS, scan the house for all makeup remover."

The disembodied English accented voice replied promptly, "Mrs. Stark, Ms. Romanoff, and Ms. Potts are the only people with access to makeup remover at this time, young sir.

"Is Mom even home?"

"Yes."

Awesome. He could just go into his parents' room and- "Wait, JARVIS, is Dad home, too?"

"Yes, young sir."

-and have his father see him like this, thus becoming even more disappointed in his offspring than before. Tony let out an exasperated sigh. "Wish me luck, Bruce. I'm headed back."

Bruce patted him on the shoulder then wordlessly continued on to his original destination.

Tony began his walk of shame to the battle field.

O0O0O0

"Are we clear, you three?" Fury snapped.

A chorus of, "Yes, Sir!" replied. Clint threw in a salute, as per usual.

"Good." Fury acknowledged. "Barton, I'll escort you back to your room this time to guarantee your arrival."

Clint bit his lip. "While I'm touched that you want to protect me during my travels, I know that darkness monsters don't exist anymore, and that if they did, there's nothing anyone can do to stop them-I'll be kidnapped by them either way- so there's no point in you coming. But don't worry. If they don't want me to make it back to the room and snatch me, I'll scream or something." He was getting more confident in sassing Fury.

"Watch it. Or I might just let them get you, kid."

O0O0O0

Hearing footsteps, Tony tucked into the next linen closet he saw. He bit back a laugh as he heard Clint, with Fury, pass by. It was always funny to see your partner in crime get busted. Well, to Tony.

"Are they far enough away?" He whispered to the ceiling.

"Mr. Fury and Mr. Barton have arrived at your room, young sir." Ever-reliable JARVIS answered.

Tony journeyed on.

O0O0O0

The blue and pink boy nudged open the door he knew to be the girls'. Their room was even darker than the hallways were. Even his mostly adjusted eyes were still having trouble seeing. Hopefully Pepper didn't set up any traps.

He made his way to where he guesstemated the basket to be- given they hadn't moved it since he was in here last. Perhaps he could just find it himself and that would be the end of that? One could hope. His toe smashed ungracefully into the basket fulfilling his hope. _Eureka._

Figuring it would be best to just take the whole basket because a) Peps and Natasha should not have have position of this artillery and b) then he could go somewhere lighted to rummage through it, Tony groped for the handles. Right as the kit was lifted off the ground, he heard the door click closed and the lights flicker on.

"You shouldn't have come back here, Stark."

Okay, he believed Clint 100 percent now. Natasha was a ninja who could silently travel at the speed of light. "Err. Do you have any make up remover?" No point in lying now.

"If you want the makeup off, why are you stealing a basket of the stuff?"

Tony looked down. It _did_ look a bit like he was trying to steal more makeup, he'd give her that. "No I-"

She didn't let him finish. "God, you're a junkie already. When you go, you go big, doncha, Stark? Steve's really going to have his work cut out for him."

"Wait, what? Bruce sent me."

"You got Bruce addicted?"

"Addicted? What are you talking about?"

Pepper took this as her cue to jump in. "You- and apparently Bruce- are makeup junkies now, but you're too embarrassed to admit it, and Steve is in charge of your rehab, or so we assume."

Tony thought long and hard about how to respond to that. "If I agree that all you have said is in fact true, can I keep the basket?"

Pepper trotted over to Nat so they could whisper amongst themselves. "Do we want to hurt him or help him?"

"I don't know" Nat whispered back. "What do you want?"

"I kind of feel guilty about addicting him."

"So would keeping the basket help him or hurt him?"

"I think it would help. Giving him more of the stuff might make his… _condition_ worse."

"Okay then."

Nat approached Tony. "Drop the basket and walk away." She ordered.

Tony pouted. "But I neeeeeeed it."

"Drop it."

Tony glared; he wasn't a dog holding a stick for god's sake! But he still dropped the basket. "Well now what am I supposed to do! This stuff," He motioned to his colorful face. "is like cement glue. Trust me; I'd know."

The cement glue comment went unnoticed. "Just go back to your room and go to sleep."

Tony stormed out. _Go to the girls, he said. They'll give you remover, he said. You could exchange the makeup for bruises, he said. Thanks, Bruce_._ Thanks a lot. _He pulled a white square out of his pocket, skeptical. Hopefully he had snagged what he wanted, not acetone nail polish remover.

O0O0O0

Bruce sat down quietly next to Steve. "What did I miss?"

"Thor yelling at Loki for being careless, and Loki yelling back clever things."

"Oo, where's the popcorn?" Bruce joked.

Steve smirked then turned back to the show.

O0O0O0

Thor had had enough of Loki's excuses. Did he not realize he had worried him so? And that blasted scepter of Loki's being waved in his face! It was ridiculous.

Thor took the scepter from his brother. "Why do you carry this? Is it some sort of stick? Are you preparing for a surprise roast of the marshmallows?"

Loki was more cross than ever. How dare he take the battle scepter. "You've gone too far, brother. Return it to me."

"No, you are a ridiculous child. Build something anew with these remains." He crumbled the scepter, allowing every block to fall unceremoniously.

"I ONLY WANTED TO HAVE SOMETHING COOL LIKE YOU, THOR. I HATE YOU." Loki yelled as his beloved was murdered in front of him. He fought a war inside him trying desperately not to cry. The shattered boy picked up the hammer Thor chucked at him earlier, and threw it against the ground with all his might. How would Thor like it when his precious hammer was destroyed?

O0O0O0

It wasn't destroyed. Not a single block had fallen out of place. Thor laughed loudly and wholeheartedly. As if this was all a game to him. Loki was floored. To him, it was not a game; it never was. It was a constant struggle to stay out of his brother's massive shadow. There were the little things, like making clever comments when he knew his wit would be appreciated, to the big things, like his battle scepter. It was the one thing that he had invented and was proud of, even though it was just of Legos. And Thor should have known that. Why didn't he know that? He always raved about how much he cared, how much he loved his little brother, but did he even pay attention? No. This was all a game to him, and it was unfair.

Loki didn't give himself time to think strategy. Between the fall of the hammer and the laughter, he had simply acted. Maybe the shove caught his brother too off guard, and maybe the wall was a little too close. He probably should have stopped swinging his arms when Thor was cradling his own head, or when he began to see silent tears stream down the blonde's face. But as the sound of Steve screaming, "Loki, stop! Loki, he's hurt! Tony's walls are reinforced. I think he hit head!" all he could feel was the burning of his own crying and the adrenaline fueling his every move. _It wasn't right. It wasn't fair! It's time Thor learned. _He tried to reason with himself and use those thoughts to push the ones urging him to stop, to remember all the times Thor had made him happy or protected him, away.

When Fury pulled him off Thor he yelled, "I loved you more than anyone, Thor! More than anyone! You've crossed the line! This! Is! War!"

Bruce was quickly at Thor's side, looking at his head for any sign of blood. (He was going to be a doctor one day. This was good practice.) He gave Fury a nod when he saw no signs of cuts or wounds. Fury nodded back in understanding and then took Loki out of the room.

Clint, who had arrived with Fury, was the first to crack a joke. "Guess Loki'll be finding out about that laser eye then, huh?"

Thor had long since stopped crying, "My baby brother is not good when staying up late. He was once a cranky babe. Now a cranky child. I am sorry for his disruption of this wonderful night."

"You just got the crud beaten out of you by a kid two years younger and half your size. That was insanity, not a bad mood." Clint said.

"I'll admit," Thor thought over his word choice. "that Loki was out of line, but in our family, we quarrel like warriors. He was physical this time, which was odd, but he must've learned from me. He and I will talk much of this later. Again, I am truly sorry."

Tony loudly cleared his throat from the doorway. "Um, what did I miss?"

Clint explained the best he could. "Well, Loki went psycho after Thor's hammer didn't break but his stick did, and then Fury came and I don't think we're going to be allowed to sleepover anymore because of this."

"That's a shame. I missed out on the fun. But at least the glue I used on your hammer held."

Steve noticed Tony's skin color. "Glad to see you're not purple anymore, Tony."

"He was purple?" Clint asked in earnest.

"I think it was more of a blue-y pink." Bruce chirped in.

"How blue-y pink?" Clint pressed.

Bruce pointed to Thor who, despite all that had happened, was still blue from Loki's first ambush. "Like that, only with a coating of pink cotton candy. Or the pink and blue swirl you get from Trix yogurt."

"Cool."

O0O0O0

"Do you want to tail him?" Natasha asked a few minutes after Tony left.

"I don't see the point." Pepper replied, instead of admitting that she was tired and didn't want to use the last of her energy on a hopeless mission.

"Well, he managed to snag something from the basket. I'm not sure what it was."

Pepper closed her eyes. Of course he snagged something. Tony was just too much. She had always told him that the world does not revolve around Tony Stark, but, Jesus, did it sometimes feel like hers did. Being the responsible girl she was, Pep agreed to tail him. She had convinced herself that it would save time in the future by doing the damage control earlier.

When the pair found Tony in his room, makeup gone; with Thor literally blue; Clint, Bruce and Steve talking colors; and Loki nowhere to be found, all they could do was stare.

"Hey beautiful, would you like to come in and sit with me?"

Natasha stood her ground. Surely Clint couldn't have noticed her from the crack in the doorway? He was bluffing.

"Or is the view better from a distance?" Tony added.

Okay, not a bluff. She gritted her teeth and entered, Pepper close behind as backup incase things wnet wrong. She sat next to Clint since there was no point in being sneaky anymore. "Why do you add comments? Do you have a death wish, Stark?"

Tony just grinned.

O0O0O0

Pepper was ghosting on the other side of the room. She wasn't really sure what to do now that their cover was blown. And then there was the mystery that was Tony's clear face.

O0O0O0

Natasha scooted closer to Clint. "How did you know we were there?"

Clint scooted closer to her. Their knees bumped a little. "I told you. I'm a bit of a ninja myself. But not a crazy love ninja like you. I didn't even know they have a love ninja area of SHIELD until now. Is Tony in your area? He's really good with people like that."

"I think Tony's area is being a big mouth."

Tony moved over to the pair. "I heard that."

"Glad you could join us, Tony!" Natasha said a bit too enthusiastically. Clint looked very unglad at his friend's arrival. "Now tell me- What did you take from the makeup basket?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." Tony denied the question.

"How did you bounce back from your addiction so quickly?"

"Because I wasn't addicted in the first place. Duh."

Nat rolled her eyes. "Well then how did you get it off?"

"With the makeup remover I nabbed. You are the worst ninja ever."

"At least I don't have cooties, Stark."

Clint spoke before Tony. "For the record, I don't have cooties. Tony might though."

"I don't have cooties, Clint." Tony shot back.

"I'm glad you don't have cooties, Clint." Natasha ignored Tony.

Clint smiled then cautiously laces his fingers through Natasha's. He was relieved when she didn't break his wrist, and more relived when she laced hers back while arguing with Tony.

O0O0O0

When Thor had fallen asleep, because dealing with Loki was tiring even to him; Tony, Clint and Natasha were talking in a triangle; and Steve was doing his best to stay away from anything that looked remotely like trouble, Bruce slid over to Pepper. Out of everyone, he understood best what dealing with Tony meant. Not being easy was an understatement. "Whatever he did, I'm sure it was an in the moment thing that he'll deny later."

Pepper was relieved that Bruce had come over to her. Being a shy wallflower really wasn't her thing. "I believe you. He's an idiot."

"You look tired."

"Well, it's almost midnight and I think you know what kind of day I've had."

"Yeah." And Bruce really did know. Bruce had Stark Duty last year. "Do you want me to walk you back to your room so you can sleep?"

"Yes. Thank you. You're the best, Bruce."

_If only everyone thought that._ Bruce thought. He had friends enough, but 'the best' was not how he was usually described.

O0O0O0

Pepper had thanked him again when they got to her room and he left her to rest. He got back to his room to find that thirty minutes had passed and so had his friends' remaining energy.

Steve was to the right of the door, asleep on his stomach. Tony was sprawled out diagonally on his bed looking more dead than asleep. Maybe Natasha wasn't all empty threats? No, wait, she was sharing a blanket with Clint to the left, on the floor. Clint wasn't good at sharing from the start and definitely would have been averse to sharing with the girl who murdered his friend. So Stark was asleep then.

Thor was still fast asleep at the back of the room and was snoring slightly. He must have been dreaming about fighting, seeing how his arm twitched. Loki was still gone. Not really a surprise, all things considered. Bruce snuggled down into his sleeping bag.

He was comforted with the fact that he would wake up to what would no doubt be a strawberry pancake morning.

* * *

**A.N: And there it is. I hope you enjoyed it! Thank you for favoriting and signing up to story alerts! Reviews are most appreciated. **


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